Well, personal life. When I was growing up in America, growing up brown, you know, I realized I needed to be ready to be flexible, to be, uh, you know, agile and to to move when something was going to go against me. I don't know why I learned because my dad and my mom was too busy just surviving. So I guess the the innate and innate behavior of survival was a way for me to overcome the type of discrimination and prejudice that one goes through growing brown. And then I don't want to say this, but I have to say it when I was going to my high school. No, no blame to them. It was like almost 80%, if not more all whites. So there was very few minorities. And and so we really stuck around more like brothers and sisters, not like a chance to have a relationship. And when I did date a Caucasian girl, it was temporary and I realized why because because I was a so-called maybe star football player, the white girls would use me as a trophy to to say that look who I'm with, right? They didn't see the color. They just saw that I was a were top performers in football. And I realized that I said have been taken. So there were very few Asian Americans in my campus, very few Filipino Filipina. Right. And so I got lucky and met my girlfriend at another school where I was, where I taught, Mountain View High School, where you have a lot more Filipinos. And so I realized that having a relationship with someone of your culture improves the quality of your communication and appreciation of from food to things that you wear to gatherings that you, you attend to. Right? If I brought my white girlfriend to my Filipino gathering, it looks strange. It felt strange, right? Because everybody else is Filipino and I have this Caucasian girlfriend and everybody staring at you like how's that?
So having a Filipino girlfriend made it so much comfortable and then marry a Filipina. Uh, as my partner, I also, you know, had some commonalities of knowing what we want to do. And so for she could cook Filipino food, cause it was so good and so on. And then, of course, my son only had to deal with a singular culture, you know, because we're both Ilocano. And so he was pure Ilocano and and he understood that and knew what it meant to to relate to someone of your culture in a personal, intimate way. And I'll have one son, as I said, and he's grown up to be quite a hero in many people's eyes because of what he does in helping young people to continue to go on to college, as well as he's a hip hop artist and a professional and renowned photographer. So if he doesn't give Daddy a credit because, you know, that's okay, we give it to mommy that he got his I say his professionalism from his mom, but that's all right. That's the way it should be. And then, of course, family. My family has been very supportive and all the things that I've done, which is not not often familiar to many families because I have five sisters and they were they were they were always, always there for me, especially when I ran for public office. That was the highest level of activism except I lost the decision to continue the marriage because my wife at that time didn't want to be in politics. And I was being now I will admit I was being egotistical and saying, "Well, I want to, and so if you don't want to, fine." You know, it's the most stupidest thing I ever decided on to split because of my ego of being, you getting into politics. But I think there was that, you know, that urging that this is a way to step up. If you're in politics, you can make decisions and you can also correct and improve changes for, you know, everybody as a public official.
(Interviewer) And how did you balance family life with your activism and everything that you were doing?
I don't think there was any balance. I think I'm going to say this. I feel like that my my spiritual well-being focus on helping people and supporting people and standing up for people. Because I as you go back to when I was in elementary school, when the bus driver was driving and he thought he wanted to be cruel to the students in the bus, he would jam the breaks, and some of the students would fly across to the bus and, you know, get injured. And the bus driver thought it was funny. Well, I went up to the bus driver and I told him off. I said, you can't do that. You're hurting us. And if you continue, I'm going to report you. So just even at third grade, I was already practicing, you know, activism. So all my life there's there's some form of activism.
And and my mom, who didn't care for it because she didn't like not so much the activism, but because my hair was down to my my shoulders, you know, I was like, what the hell is this? You know, looking like a hippie? But she realized later on when my dad that it was the greatest part of doing something for the community, so that when they would go into the community, they would say, Oh, you're Ben Menor's father and mother? They would get credit and they would feel proud that they they contribute by bringing up their son to be what he is. Yeah.